May 18, 2011

Word of God

Had my doctors appointment Monday morning, where he not only took out some stitches, but put in more after cleaning out what was not healing. I have found myself more tender from that day than the last time he did it. I also found out that it may be possible to end up with having chemotherapy in a few weeks. It was a tough day when I went to work, between hurting and being a bit frightened of what is coming it was just too much. It wasn't a good 1st week back at all. The heat is tiring along with the uncertainty of finding myself on the outside rather than the inside.

I went back to Adoration for the first time yesterday as well. A wonderful hour, but I also found myself tired same as when I went to Mass this morning, my blood sugar was good but was very tired when I came home. I ended up sleeping for three hours. Those moments like that are not just at work as I have mentioned they occur doing minimal things. But I suppose it's to be expected that it will take time to heal.

I remember this morning at Mass I couldn't help recall those few times when the Eucharist came alive on my tongue. It was those moments of memory that came through to reinforce Jesus's presence in my life in those moments when he was so very alive. I will never forget how that felt or how wonderful it was to know that particular Grace was meant for me. These memories are what sustain me as I face these trials. Memories that I love to share and reveal to those who need to know that Jesus is very much alive in the Eucharist. It shouldn't take a trial in our lives to bring us closer to God to begin with. We should have that relationship as we have begun to grow up when we were learning as children, from our parents and teachers. Anyway, for me this morning was good in that regard. Because God is love in every sense of the Word. Even when we hear the Word of God.

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