Living Life the Right Way

One thing about faith it's knowing there is more than one way to die. We can die from sin or we can from the ways of the world. I examined a bit more to the meaning of dying in a dream. A way of dying about our own selves. It's going to the next level in faith. I think I have understood this today as I began to see how much I have been able to talk to others much easier than I used to. Plus I have begun to speak more openly about what I saw to others. I think I died of my keeping it quiet. I still let the Holy Spirit be my guide on speaking. So as we live life there are many times we have to die to the ways in which we live our life as well.

For me it was the choice to leave the world and become a religious. As I have begun the process of checking communities and seeing how the discernment works in that regard. There was something I noticed about charisms when I spoke to a friend. It seems that they are all founded on Jesus but have many fathers, St. Dominic, St. Francis, St. Augustine and so very many more, with women founders as well. Yet they all are one with God, at least in this I hope it is so. The charism of Jesus is the one that I seek to follow but where do I find this when they are founded on the charism of a Saint. And theirs are all different. What happens when we have bits and pieces that mesh together from all of them. I said that to my friend, I could fit with the Franciscans as well as the Dominicans and the Augustinians. I have a rapport with animals like St. Francis, but not in the way he did. So the process of discernment in community goes on a new route. Sister Juanita had given me a book on discernment to read as part of this process. So the next time I see her will be able to have much more in the way of understanding the process a person goes through. Except I think I have already been put through a bigger process than humans put us through.

Wonderful

There is hope! Someone at work who has been away from the Church is thinking of coming back. When it was mentioned today I was filled with happiness that they are seeking to come back. This person is willing to go to Church with me too. WoW! I am thrilled! The talk about sacraments, faith and growing up brought back some memories for this person.

I went to a wake after work for a person who was part of the Lay Dominicans. It was nice that someone called from the Order to let me know. It's always a sad time when someone passes from this life.

I discovered there is something I can do after work, and that is go to Vespers at the Monastery Chapel. It may not be daily Mass but at least it will be in community.

And for me I guess I feel too much, and need to learn more of the Magisterium. It's time to put on the thinking cap once again and put my mind to work and do more reading along with my lessons for the novice class. To read about the intellectual side of things has put me in a frame of mind that maybe I have been too much in the heart and not enough of the cold logic. And I thought my mind and heart were in tune with each other. Isn't that what we are suppose to be with God, one in heart, mind, body and soul.

When we are at peace and in tune with God, there is no volatile nature. Our emotions are his emotions, our thoughts are his thoughts, our sorrow is his sorrow. There is nothing that we do that he doesn't already know. I can thank the comments that have come to light to bring this reflection.

I do know my heart and my feelings, I know what I am capable of and what I am not. I know when I sin and when I don't. I know when I am wrong and I will admit it. But when God made me this way, then it is part of his plan that I am the way I am. Along the way he steers me in the direction in the way of what to read what to write and so forth. After all it is his will I follow. So when the whisper says stretch out your arm in the Chapel, and I do, then I have done His Will. And I can say that yes this wonderful time I did exactly that and what a beautiful, beautiful heartfelt joy came flooding in.

This is how he shows me and teaches me his wonderful love. I may be just a little nothing in the eyes of the world, but in God's I am everything to him. Just like the millions of others out there are the same to him too. It's just truly wonderful. Someday I hope many will feel this love too.