February 28, 2008

Pink Cards of Love

Ever do something you wish you never did. I do. Long time ago on a day that comes around every four years, February 29, has a name called Sadie Hawkins Day. A day where a woman could propose to a man. I did that when I was in my early twenties to a guy I loved deeply. It didn't go too well, he refused, but we still saw each other anyway. That was a lesson I will never forget, a good memory though. I can imagine if he said yes, life would have been a little different and I might be living in New Hampshire. That's where he has lived for quite a long time now with his family. And I'm happy for him. But that was gutsy to ask and as I look back I realize I took chances on many things and continue to survive the odds in a world that knocks people down.

Not in all areas or places do they create odds for people. One thing I have learned was to trust in God so much for most of my life, even when the odds are against I still hope that tomorrow is always a better day for all of us.

When I went to the Chapel this evening, I had a little shock when I looked at the table in the entryway. A place where there are some flyers for vocations and other stuff people drop off. Well this little shock was a long card of the dark pink kind, with the same prayer I posted this morning. On the reverse side is Psalm 139. Amazing how God manages to touch us when we need to be touched. This morning the prayer came to mind, good thing too. I found out that the hours at work are being cut for awhile, so I managed to let the temp agency know I would like to fill in if needed at other places while work is slow. Plus I can try to find a permanent position elsewhere. The day turned out good inspite of time loss. I did receive a place to go to to cover some hours and then when I felt a bit overwhelmed, I went to the Chapel and voila! I love Him so much that I often forget that in this relationship it's not just me but Him too and he shows His love in unique ways to say I am here with you. One thing I have to get used to is that in a relationship with God I have to think in human terms to understand about it not being one-sided, such as I give Him my love, I need to also accept and take His in the many ways He shows and gives it to me. I'm not sure if I was doing that before, I thought I was. But sometimes in our own relationship with others we can become uncertain about how they feel, at times I get that way with my relationship with God. Those are the days where I feel so alone, bereft of His presence, and yet he is there, just not felt like it felt in the days of His courtship. At least in this regard I understand that.

2 Words of Wisdom:

teresa_anawim2 said...

Our search and our quest never ends until we reach the Beatific Vision.
However, one day we will see MC established in the right place He has for her as her search for a Community is realized.
We pray and go along with you in your search, MC.

Marie Cecile said...

Thank you teresa_anawim2, your prayers are always welcome. I pray that search comes to fruit soon.

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