Prayers Please

My mom has been having a few difficult days. When I was able to spend time with her yesterday after work, she told me she thought she was going to die the day before. She's been feeling awful since the day after surgery. I've never seen her so agitated and uncomfortable. I've had so much on my mind these past few days with her as most of the focus for strength.

Yesterday I blurted out those words at work about dying, it is the closeness one has with their family when they know difficulties are present. It's the last thing any of us want to happen. My mom asked for prayers last night. She is really having a hard time praying herself. I don't think she is going to pass away, but when pain medication and after a tough surgery it can make a body feel horrible and it's worst for those who are aged. Tougher for her since illness has been most of her life. Faith has kept a smile upon her face during some of the roughest spots.

I can't say the same for myself, because of my own heart condition there is much that hinders me from doing and then there are things I shouldn't even do. But how do we stop stress when at times like this family is in the forefront and worry about them is constant. Then work has it's own issues to deal with and sometimes those we work with are not much help either. And then there is our own stupidity in how we deal with it. Major blunders when fear for family create havoc in the workforce. Like I said I made a good one and I am the only one to blame for it. I may not like how I dealt with a situation but on a whole I too need to forgive myself for it and move on and let it go.

Having God present in our lives does not always guarantee smooth sailing, what he does is bring peace in chaotic moments of darkness and turmoil when we believe in him and I do.