May 24, 2008

Just Moments

Occasionally there are moments in my life when I have to stand back and wonder. Like the other day and the profound thoughts that come and with it the moments of experience. They do not die nor do they fade in time. I am forever grateful. I know at times there are moments when I don't feel worthy and yet I have done nothing to bring that about. I think it is in those brief readings about the saints that I glimpse more of what they endured for the sake of the kingdom of God. No matter what I have experience I cannot think my self any better than the person I stand next to. I am only a small cog in the wheel of life, and that is as it should be. I love him more than life itself, but I am only me in a land of giants. Recordare was a word I once received quite sometime ago, a word that literaly means to remember, a word and all that has been encompassed I will not ever forget.

Now I understand why some songs spoke loudly of specific things, they were all part of the process of understanding the bigger picture. Have I truly understood it all, mostly. There are somethings that in their turn will begin to make more sense as time allows. One thing is certain, I don't feel as if I measure up to the many people who have such a deep and beautiful faith, that's the area that I don't seem to feel like I belong. I never felt throughout my whole life as if I felt I belonged anywhere or to anyone. It's the strangest part of my life that had me wonder why I loved so deeply and yet at one time I had a that grace to know that souls do collide and meld. I am happy to love more than anything to love God above all.

6 Words of Wisdom:

teresa_anawim2 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Marie Cecile said...

Oh I know the importance of being ourselves. There was a moment when I was writing I had flashbacks when I was child and what I felt way back then and falshbacks to a particular moment with others. It's possible that what I was having was a moment of growing and being with those of faith, the difference. There is something I need to continue to learn is to distinguish the correlation when I have a moment of then and now. I'm not truly alone in the regard of faith as God is there beside me as well as the many spiritual brothers and sisters such as yourself and the many others who walk the journey of faith. And for that I am deeply grateful for your love and the love of others. Your advice is well taken and I thank you with all my heart.

teresa_anawim2 said...

Words are elusive. Words are hard to interpret.
I deleted my 1 st comment to this post because of an incorrect interpretation to your post.
You sounded so despondent in this post..I did not understand it as if it were a rememberance of childhood, but as if it were a present day trial of faith you were going through.
I am glad you are doing well and are not troubled .

Anonymous said...

oh teresa I'm so sorry that it came out that way. That wasn't my intention when I was writing. I wonder if for some reason those feelings came through from listening to a song that brought tears of joy but also sadness. I didn't realize it might of came through. And you didn't misinterpret either, you responded to what you felt you were reading and that's okay. MC

teresa_anawim2 said...

aside:
MC, I stumbled across this gal's blog today and her journey sounded familiar;discerning a vocation in mid-life,paying off debts,and living day-to-day while awaiting the Lord's direction.
Take a look;thought you'd be interested.
http://yeah-okay.blogspot.com/

Marie Cecile said...

Thank you for the link teresa, I will take a look. I'm always interested in discerning the religious life and what it entails.

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