March 30, 2008

No More Doubts

I have begun to see how truly an instrument I am in God's hands. Before Easter, music began speaking again in profound ways, but I have also seen that it wasn't only the lyrics it was also the name of the group that captured me as well. The last one I know had a twofold way with it, but I also noted how the group name stood out as well. They are called MercyMe. If that alone doesn't speak volumes then I must deaf to his promptings.

The same also for the picture of the Sacred Heart, one would swear that when I have written something of value, it seems as if a smile shows itself. Todays reading had to do with Thomas and his doubt, that brought me into my own doubt as well. Thomas believed in Jesus, but his resurrection was difficult for him and touching the wounds gave him the proof to come to grips with this truth. I can associate with St. Thomas in many ways. I too have believed in Jesus all my life, but when I was given something extraordinary, I had an extremely hard time believing he would chose me to receive such a gift of seeing him in the Blessed Sacrament. A place where I have always believed in his presence.

I would sit and watch and listen to people talk about their faith and I began to wonder why not choose them, they can speak eloquently about faith and spirituality and the saints so easily. Me I am just a simple person who loves but knows little about it all. And maybe that's why he gave me something wonderful to behold, the simple fact of not truly knowing much to begin with. I can't tell a person all about the Church and faith, but I can tell you about his love. I never thought I deserved to be loved in such a beautiful way, and yet he loves me for me as I am.

When I showed my pictures again to another person, I had forgotten about the fish symbol that appears periodically from the windows of my parents home. It doesn't happen all the time, yet I was reminded when I saw the picture about the other days reading about the fish too. How that too was just a symbolic of his resurrection. I think he is trying to show me how very real it all is.

4 Words of Wisdom:

teresa_anawim2 said...

God loves simplicity, I think.
I am always clearing up my life ...inner and outer...to find my way back to simplicity.
When my life gets too cluttered with activities ,etc, I lose sight of Him.
Recently I expressed this to my Spir Dir and he counseled me on reading too much heavy duty stuff too fast and not allowing time for things to absorb. All the reading material turns into clutter in the mind!
So..I am learning to take it slower..take breaks..read fewer paragraphs rest...even from blogging.

I find that for me..I get obsessed with having to post every day and at times it turns into a few posts every day. When that starts to happen , I know I am losing my focus! HIM.
I am trying to get back to the simplicity in blogging 1 or 2 meaningful posts a week rather than something every day.
With me it's cyclical.
Now, after Resurrection Sunday, I am headed towards simplicity again.
Something we all go through again and again.

Marie Cecile said...

wow teresa, then reading for you isn't always easy then. It's hard sometimes to read slowly in order to absorb what is there to reflect upon.

Blogging can be tough too, especially when inspiration is nill and you don't want to put empty stuff on there but what is beneficial to the soul.

teresa_anawim2 said...

Reading for me is too easy..I do too much of it.!!!

Bernice said...

lol teresa, I was trying to say it is not easy to read in a slower way when reading is something we do all the time. But anyway you know what I mean and I understand what you meant.

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