Crosses

I left for work yesterday morning and as I was leaving my street, a short way up the hill is a new home development. I saw a beautiful deer just standing there. It made my day seeing this. I get those rare glimpses of deer and each time I treasure them. For some reason I have always associated them with God, don't know why that it is but it is.

Work was a bit different yesterday too, one of the guys who knows of my deep religious faith and some of the graces I have received came to me to tell me there was a young lady in the bathroom crying. He asked me to go to her and for some reason I was hurting prior to and was about to refuse. When he said something to me about I need to stop denying the gift I have. He is right too. He said others look to me for a kind word and such. So off to the bathroom I went and soothed the young lady and prayed over her. But while we went back to work, I had a need to take off my cross so I pulled off my crucifix to give to her for the rest of the day to give her strength. I felt much lighter afterward. Not from the removal of the crucifix but for bringing a person out of despair and clearing the air.

When I did this mornings Gospel reading and reflected on it, this came to mind about love. Love is the answer, it is to be given and not witheld. We are to let others feel it and know they are loved. Just as the young lady was despairing she too needed reasurrance that there are people who care. Knowing that someone cares when we hurt makes a difference. I remember when people who are genuine and not out for gossip in knowing why a person was crying had helped me when times were a bit too much. Same as yesterday when another young lady wanted to know what was wrong and this was asked right in front of the one she was asking about. My reply was that if she wanted her to know she would tell her, not I. I hold what is said to me sacred by another person, it is not for me to repeat it. Besides this young lady was hurting, she needs to see faith in action and so does the other young lady need to see how respect for others is done.

Well anyway the rest of the afternoon went okay. I thanked Angel for his timely and gentle nudge. This is how I seem to live the Gospel, yet I almost failed to live this one by witholding my talent, but by the grace of God and the kindness of another who knows, gave the push of a lifetime and put me on the fast track of stopping denying the gifts I was given and begin using them for the greater good of God's kingdom. His name should also imply he's an angel in disguise too, an earthly one.

I'm going to finish sorting through my room this weekend since we have an extra day. And the other is a thought to take a short trip to Lowell to pay a visit at the Shrine there. And then head to the coast for the rest of the day, I haven't done that in a long time, go to the edge of the land where it meets the ocean. But it all depends on how much I get done and what I have left to do and if it is God's will. Always place my travels in God's hands and his will.

I took care of the lawn after work so that chore is done, now it's just laundry and some of the usual stuff. But the best part is praying and reflecting deeply on the love God has for us. There are times I feel as if a veil has been lifted from my mind and I see a clearer picture and other times it seems as if it's put back into place. It's those moments that when I see the overall picture I understand his gift far more than anything. The joy when he touched my heart and made it his own. I knew love in a way that is beyond understanding. There's nothing to describe the joy that is there and this is what I experience not as often as it was before but every now and then when I am in front of the Blessed Sacrament he will send those darts of love to my heart and nothing in this world can stop the smile that crosses my face or the joy that invades my soul. No matter how often I see his face in front of my eyes and I feel nothing, those are the moments that are true. He did something special when doubt about what I saw was prevalent, he gave me his live self to say yes I am here and yes I did give you this. And this too I had denied myself and him. I love him and I too had denied him as Peter had without realizing I did so if that 's possible. Yet I have written of the many things he has done for me and continue to do so. It is right before my own eyes and as I said the veil is lifted every once in a while.

I still have yet to find the song of the words I received. In time I'm sure it will come about, I've played just about every CD that I think it may be on and nothing so far. I hope every one has a blessed day today.